Thursday, March 22, 2012

Space Buddies: A Review!!!!!!!!

My experience watching Space Buddies: Puppies in Space, could not have been better. For starters, I watched the first half hour 3 times before actually watching it through! You know what that means? MORE PUPPIES!!!!!!!!! And puppies is what this movie is about! Also, the part where Budderball farts in his space suit and inflates it is at about 26 minutes in. So I got to see that shit 3 times!!!!! Anyway, for those who don't know the movie is about the loin fruit of the original Air Bud, 5 puppies who belong to 5 stereotypical (white) kids. The first and most annoying is Buddah (they all have names which are take offs of Bud). He is the smarmy "wise" one who is such a dick that it made me want to punch a golden retriever puppy. This is not a good thing. His sister Rosebud is a princess, who lets be honest doesn't get enough screen time. Next is B-Dawg, who is a hip hop dancer dawg, who says things like "tight" "fo'shizzle" and "that's off the chain!" It should be noted that the screenwriter responsible for these attrocities has been arrested for malicious endangerment. Prick! next we have Budderball, the fat one. Most of the jokes in the movie involve him eating or farting, though surprisingly not pooing.
Budderball thought they were headed to the "lunch pad"!!! HAHAHAHAHA!
After the gang gets Budderball they swing by to pick up MudBud. He is filthy and sadly as there is practically no mud in space is not useful for the screenwriters wicked humor. Unfortunately for us, the writers are most interested in writing obnoxious cliches for Buddah to say, or terrible, terrible "street talk" for BDawg, or making Budderball the fat one, ruled by his stomach. Oh, did I mention that there is sort of a plot?

The puppies sneak onto a commercial space craft while the kids who own them are on a class field trip to watch its test launch. Because most companies testing a brand new space craft would invite a group of stupid kids to watch their innogural launch. Anyway, once the puppies get on board there is a moment of zero gravity which The Child thought was HILARIOUS!!!!!!!

They also meet Spudnik, a Russian dog. he is pretty cool. In [this review was interupted by a fire alarm] Sorry folks, that evacuation just ruined my train of thought. Suffice it to say, Space Buddies is a fairly terrible movie but the kids will love it! The man below is the villain Dr Finkell (there is one joke where Buddah's terrible owner calls him Dr Fecal, then later Dr Stinkell).

He wears glasses, which makes you want to punch him in the face even harder!
So should you rush out and buy Space Buddies? If you like brain trauma and/or being pummeled in the genitalia metaphorically for 90 minutes, please by all means run out and buy it! Also, if you think your kids will like to watch dogs farting in space suits. The Child was standing outside of her kindy making grotesque fake farts for about 6 minutes yesterday. And that was before she saw the second fart gag. Basically what I am saying is that the movie is awesome!

Note: I am on a timed public library computer, editing is not an option. But hell this movie is over three years old anyway.

1 comment:

  1. DId they really named the Russian dog Spudnik?