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Thursday, April 14, 2011

23 year gentleman seeks virgin girls for bestfriends! C-List Maine!


As I have been extremely lazy this week, I am again sipping from the fount of knowledge which is Craigslist. Today I took a 15 minute trip to Maine, and just like the last time I was very much impressed. Of all the places I have scouted, Maine ranks with Minneapolis as a topnotch place to find friends online. If you are insane. Please enjoy the following posts. I know I did! Buzzsaw
23 year gentleman seeks virgin girls for bestfriends - m4w - 23 (Epping Nh)

Date: 2011-04-07, 10:33AM EDT
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i am seeking virgin girls for bestfriends close friends, i just dont need any extra drama i just want you to be clean of disease and free of bad habits .... it is what it is must be 18+
One thing I loved about the post is that he is seeking disease free best friends. Although some may argue the fact it is impossible to have multiple “best” friends, it seems fine to me. IF they are virgins, and disease free. Of course, it is important to note that “bad habits” are out! In a way they are like “disease.” Bad habits are the diseases of the soul, and who would want that in best friends, especially if they were disease free in the physical sense. Lastly, I bet this guy has had all sorts of high school punks trying to be his virginal best friends. That has to be annoying. I applaud this man.
looking for copany - m4w - 32 (portland)

Date: 2011-04-03, 8:27AM EDT
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looking for a rider tonight/today must be able to handel car rides and a smoker a plus if you are bored and wanna drive around . let me know . must live in portland, please leave a name and phone number for me to call you back at

The tone of this posting is casual. So casual that he is not concerned with spelling, or even capitalization of proper nouns. I like that. He also is fairly straight forward about the kind of company he seeks. Obviously he simply wants someone to drive around Portland and smoke in the car. It sounds like a whale of a time, I am sure he will find “copany.” This is the type of post that my readers will see and say “I wish I could handel car rides” or “I wish I could handel a smoker.” As for me, I hope they can, because if so, they have a wonderful opportunity right at the tips of their fingers. Simply give this unknown man your number and wait for the fun to start!

Need someone I could call Dad - w4mm - 37 (Maine)

Date: 2011-04-06, 1:39PM EDT
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Hi,
Somewhat an unusual wish. I am an orphan and am wondering if there are any people out there who never had kids but now are too old to have them and would like to have that special parents/child bonding. I am a 37 years old woman, looking for a father figure, mother figure or parents figure in my life, basically like a family. I am not looking to live together (I’m married) but just a kind warm loving relationship when we “check” on one another, touch base, maybe celebrate some holidays together and provide unconditional love and support. Perhaps we could visit museums together or go fishing.

I have no idea what to think about this post. It is quite possibly the creepiest one I have ever seen. What the hell does she mean by ‘when we “check” on one another.’? Ugh.
pizza sounds good - m4w - 25 (portland)

Date: 2011-04-01, 7:45PM EDT
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pizza and a movie sounds good
I am pretty sure this was placed by one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Probably Donatello. I am sure that some chill dudette will want to join him. He left out all unneeded details. Perfecto!
Wanted: ACTIVITIES PARTNER With Vices! - 56 (Topsham)

Date: 2011-03-31, 10:40PM EDT
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I am a heavy smoker (tobacco only), and I enjoy Mike's Hard Lemonade on a Friday night. Few of the people I know smoke or drink, and they tend to be judgmental of those who do. I'm looking for others who also feel 'criminalized' because of their vices - those only, please, who enjoy both a cigarette and a drink - and who may also feel somewhat isolated because of those vices.

I'm 56 and uninvolved, with one cat. I'm someone who loves to laugh, and even be goofy at times given the right time and place. I'm goodhearted and trustworthy - a good person to do things with.

I'm looking only for uncomplicated, PLATONIC activity partners who are INTELLIGENT, UNINVOLVED SINGLE guys. If you don't understand why I specify uninvolved guys, our moral compasses probably point in opposing, incompatible directions. Please be around my age who is again, a smoker, a moderate, sensible drinker, and someone who lives in my area (I don't have a vehicle). Mutually enjoyed activities might include yard sales; mini-golf; Scrabble or other board games or cards; playing pool or bowling.

I can usually respond to email toward the end of the week. We could get together likely on Fridays (after some communication, and a level of trust has been established).

Given the nature of Craigslist, I do ask that a respondent take a step to help prevent spam. If you reply, PLEASE ENTER "smoker" in the subject line. Any other replies will be seen as possible spam, and deleted. I will also ignore any replies of a sexual nature. Platonic means PLATONIC.

(Picture shown was taken about five yrs. ago. I'm extremely camera shy))

Thanks for your time to read this post!

I have never heard of Topsham. I now want to visit. If only to smoke all over the place and see what kind of evil glares I get. My first impulse is to introduce this woman to the smokin’ driver. But she is not in Portland. If only…What I notice about this post is that the lady wants to get drunk and not screw. Jimmy Buffett would be pissed! I do feel sorry for her, being “criminalized” and all about her cigs and Mikes Hard Lemonade, and I would love to hear her laugh. I can just see her walking up to yard sales, cigarette dangling from her lips, everyone glaring at her, smokers laugh catching in her throat because she feels “criminalized” and to be honest, it’s a sad picture. Please, if you fit the description answer the posting. I am begging you!
Hope you had as much fun as I did, Buzzsaw

1 comment:

  1. These were just plain scary but the last one made me laugh. I can hear her smokers laugh from here!

    ReplyDelete