Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Any Financially Amazing Men Out There?

Honestly, who in their right mind would skim past this quirky post. I had to look this is what I found:

Any financially amazing men out there?? - 30 (South Metro)

Date: 2011-02-09, 4:32PM CST
I am interested to see if there are any here in Minnesota that are just fun and sweet. I hope your out there. Can't wait to hear from you!

It seems that the author has abandoned her search for financially amazing men instead looking for "fun" and "sweet" guys. For me this is good. If I were more financially amazing, perhaps I would be disappointed. The post fills me with questions. Does she mean rich? If that is the case I would never qualify. Despite my lack of wealth, I think I could paint a pretty good case for being financially amazing. To begin with I am not in much debt. My college loans are paid off. My rent is paid despite the fact that I have been self employed for 9 months. When I started my business it was done using cash. No borrowed money and no one to answer to. These are quite rare in a society that preaches the gospel of mortgage and credit like they are saving lost souls. If these meant I was financially amazing perhaps I could be her new man. Unfortunately she is in Minnesota, and though I am financially amazing, I am not financially amazing enough to get to Minnesota, unless she is financially amazing enough to fly me out!

Perhaps by financially amazing she is talking about my ability to save money while still getting cool stuff. I am sure anyone reading this can appreciate the fun that comes from spending money buying things. Me too. Especially if I am a little depressed. They say that it doesn't actually help, but when you are as financially amazing as me, it does. My method for shopping spree's is very specific. There is a store which was started in Austin TX called Half Priced Books. It is truly wonderful. They have a policy that lets you get paperback books at half off the cover price! This is truly financially amazing!

What I do is look for paperbacks from the 1960's or 50's. At that time paperbacks were usually less than $1, sometimes less than $.50! so I can get out of the store with two giant bags of books for often less than $10! Amazing! Financially AMAZING! All told I feel that I am qualified to be called financially amazing!

Not to brag, but I think I am financially amazing because despite being terrible at selling, I managed to run a business in which I charged people money to take their pictures with me. This is not only an odd profession, but it is psychologically weird as well. In spite of my awkwardness, body odor, inability to stop talking, and many more odd quirks, I survived. Of course I would have liked to survive at a higher standard of living than I did, but such is life. Life as a man who can boldly claim to be "financially amazing!"

Note: Just in case you were wondering if I were financially amazing enough to loan you money, feel free to email me you bank account info as well as social security number, credit card number, PIN number, and any other financially amazing info you might have. I will then put the money into your account. Thank you.

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