CAN YOU COOK, AND GIVE A RUBS DOWN? - m4w - 36
Date: 2010-10-04, 10:40PM EDT
PROFESSIONAL.....ITALIAN.5-11.....190.......DARK, SUCCESSFUL, SINGLE, NO KIDS,NEVER MARRIED.....SEARCHING FOR A SOUL MATE, PROFESSIONAL,SWEET HEART,
.......FRIENDS FIRST........SEND PIC AND NUMBER
I love the aggressive tactics of our Professional....Italian. He starts out with all caps, and darned if he does not continue yelling throughout the posting! I know almost nothing about "netiquette", but I even know that all caps means you are yelling. if nothing else this reinforces the stereotype about Italians being loud and obnoxious. Fortunately I do know three actual Italians, and one who claims Italian ancestry, and even speaks fake Italian sayings, which trust me is quiet magnificent to witness. Out of these 4 people, I found the stereotype to be true in three out of four cases. so wait, I guess I just shot down whatever seemingly intelligent conclusion I was about to "proclaim". Alright Buzzsaw, focus...CAN YOU COOK AND GIVE A RUBS DOWN? Trust me this a completely valid question. If you can't give a rubs down, why would anyone, let alone a PROFESSIONAL.....ITALIAN want to even have a platonic relationship. I am an unemployed, mulatto of untraceable European decent (part Swedish, Scottish, English, Prussian...untraceable) and if you came up to my in the club and tried to start a conversation, there would only be two questions. CAN YOU COOK AND GIVE RUBS DOWN? I usually throw that out on the table, and if I sense any hesitation at all, your goose is cooked. I am MOVING ON. You see there is a little thing, called www.plentyoffish.com and I happen to know that. So if you can't give RUBS DOWN, why would I want anything to do with you? Seriously, it is almost like getting punched in the face when you meet someone, think they might be the one, then find out that they cannot in fact GIVE RUBS DOWN. How hard is it? Not like rocket science. Not even like regular science. IT IS A RUBS DOWN! Sometimes people just make me sick. And I am not talking about H1N1, it is more like just depression. SEARCHING FOR A SOULMATE....PROFESSIONAL SWEETHEART. Strictly platonic. Some might think it crazy, but I have stood on a city corner and yelled the same thing. It really can be a drag just trying to cultivate a unique friendship in this shallow world. When I just want some ITALIAN food, a PROFESSIONAL SWEETHEART, and of course RUBS DOWN! MORE RUBS DOWN! AND EVEN MORE PROFESSIONAL RUBS DOWN! And you think your life is difficult. As I said, even the jobless guy would have these simple criteria before even having a conversation. Is it so wrong? I think not, it is a matter of priorities, and if you have a problem with it, TAKE A HIKE UNTIL YOU LEARN TO GIVE RUBS DOWN!